Decisions, Decisions...

We finally did it. It only took us fifteen years, but we finally stopped drinking coffee like George Clooney and switched our Nespresso coffee maker for a traditional espresso machine. We didn’t want to use the fancy but unnecessary coffee pods and be dependent on one brand. Sorry, George.

As much as I cared about the environment, parting with my Nespresso machine didn’t come easily. I have gone through the whole waste reduction project and abandoned most things packaged, but I religiously made my online coffee orders and then, to feel better about myself, shipped my used coffee pods across the country in the name of recycling. The ease of making a perfect cup of coffee within minutes was surely one of the reasons why I didn’t want to make the change sooner. (We humans might not always keep it simple, but we do like it easy, don’t we?)

I am not most known for choosing the line of least resistance though, so that wasn’t a full story. The main reason why I stuck with Nespresso brand for so long was their limited offer. There are several types of Nespresso coffee makers. There are hundred types of traditional espresso makers. How was I supposed to choose the right one?

Raised by the parents who didn’t believe in second chances, I found choosing traumatizing. I weighed every decision, from selecting a college to picking yoghurt, like it was a matter of life or death. It was a long and lonely process, but I stuck with it for the lack of alternatives. I didn’t trust anyone enough to make the right choices for me.

Many good and bad decisions later, I learned that my approach to making choices was often a waste of time. Not every decision needed my oversight and hours of research. I was also learning to talk about my preferences, likes, and dislikes more- the more people knew what I liked and wanted, the more successful their advice. So, when my husband volunteered to choose an espresso machine for us, so that we could finally forgo the coffee pods, I jumped at the idea. He enjoyed making decisions and was quick at it. What a time saver! And look at me! I didn’t even try to micromanage his online shopping!

Unfortunately, as soon as the machine arrived and I tried to make my coffee at 6:45 in the morning, while packing my son’s lunchbox, feeding the dog and making breakfast, I realized that somewhere along the way I made a mistake. This machine was not made for the multitasking my mornings required.

A storm of thoughts filled my head. I shouldn’t have let my husband choose the coffee machine without giving him my detailed input. We should have kept the Nespresso and dealt with the pods- they were recyclable after all. I shouldn’t be so high- maintenance about my coffee! I could drink tea. Why couldn’t I make a decision and be happy with the results for once! What’s wrong with my decision-making process?!

The more I thought about it and talked about it (with a coach), the more I realized that there was actually nothing wrong with my decision making process. I took decisions in line with my values (traditional espresso machine was less wasteful), I didn’t like to micromanage and I wanted to include others in the decision making process, especially if they wanted to have a say (my husband was eager to go shopping), and I tried to make educated choices by comparative research to prevent the buyer’s remorse I was prone to. While the first two components were present in my espresso case study, the third one was missing: I didn't do my research. As a result, the moment something went wrong with my new appliance (I forgot to fill the water container), my overactive amygdala switched into panic mode. "Bad decision!" Was it a false alarm or should I act upon it?

I acted. Belated as it was, I did do my basic research. I didn’t mind the hustle of returning the machine in case I would have found something better, but I didn't have to. My machine checked all the boxes. I was glad that in case of a coffee maker I trusted my husband to take a decision quickly. It was a decision good enough.

My tentative exercise was effective. Once I convinced myself that I had made a good decision, I calmed down immediately. There was nothing wrong with my new coffee maker. I just needed to learn to operate it.

The same was valid for my decision making process. It worked. It wasn't for everyone, but it worked for me. I just needed to trust it.

Within days, I mastered the skill of making espresso to my satisfaction while packing my son's lunchbox, feeding the dog and making breakfast.